Understanding The Anger Paradox

anger management classes perth

The "Anger" Paradox…

With now more than three decades of professional practice in this field, and out of some tens of thousands of consultations, I can easily state that in my clinical experience, and fascinatingly, 99% of people presenting with anger, are not in point of fact, angry.

I simply cannot overstate the paramount importance of establishing this! For if this is not recognised at the outset, an individual will inevitably undertake a possibly lengthy and ultimately wholly inappropriate course of “Anger Management” treatment.

The true underlying reason for an individual’s anger presentation, will very quickly be established during their Initial Consultation; and thus an appropriate course of future action devised.

"The customer is always wrong".

The above is a little-known maxim in the Psychoanalytic industry. Although on face value this could very easily be misinterpreted as a superior, aloof and ultimately narcissistic stance; it is not.

You’ll no doubt be aware of the aphorism that states an individual "cannot see the wood (forest) for the trees." Well here similarly "proximity is our enemy." That is to say, we (all of us) are simply far too close to ourselves to see what is truly going on. Thus it takes someone that is sufficiently distant from us to aid with the process of drawing this (our "stuff") to our attention.

For instance, an individual may earnestly complain of X, Y & Z; citing these to be the bane of their life. They genuinely believe these, and only these, are exclusively responsible. However because of that person’s proximity, they may be incapable of seeing that there are entirely different alphabet letters at work and therefore to blame.

re-consider your "anger"